"Just when I catch my breath, you turn around and make me lose it again." Any woman would be flattered with a remark like this. NIGEL Oh CHILDREN Nine times two is eighteen. $5,000? I have suffered in this jail. "Bambinatum est magitum." Yes. It's not trash, Daddy, it's lovely. I'm not crying because it's sad. Lord knows we've tried. DOCTOR What's this? Being funny or clever can also help your chances of success. I told you I was supposed to start school in September. 2. . "'The Burning Woman, Hurling Through the Air, with Dynamite in Her Hair, over Sharks and Spiky Objects, Caught By the Man Locked in a Cage', and it is the most dangerous feat ever known to man! MISS TRUNCHBULL . Oh, my good Lord! What is this trash you're reading? . Honest. The most common thing in life is life . Of course they didn't believe me: I've got green hair! Goofs 'Cause if you're little, you can do a lot. [bends down] Dearest pie, how old is Matilda? You gotta be loud! That's it! A contract is a contract is a contract! MAN: Have you seen his school report? Harry Wormwood: MISS HONEY is left in a pile stage right. BIG KIDS The tiniest mite packs the mightiest sting. WOMAN: And insightful. What do you want a book for? Zinnia Wormwood: . [She exits down the steps and stops behind the first portion of the audience.] Just you wait for phys-ed! MRS PHELPS screams and exits. [loses it, to Matilda] Is your nickname glucose? You That makes me so happy. Zinnia Wormwood: That's not fair! Find the bally line and toe it, Mr Wormwood! A denizen of the underworld! Matilda : I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of. have you read a whole book? . 80+ Extremely Hot & Sexy Pick Up Lines To Use On Guys & Girls 2023 Yes, yes. Harry Wormwood: Listen, you little wiseacre: I'm smart, you're dumb; I'm big, you're little; I'm right, you're wrong, and there's nothing you can do about it. MISS HONEY (Starts to go, but really this time) I'm going to put the newt in Trunchbull's jug! Stood! It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. It is, is it? From now on, this family does *exactly* what I say, when exactly, when I say it! A girl I know used to live in that house. I am trying to pull off the biggest business deal of my life and I have to listen to this. Lights up. I sold it for $999. Life's a ball, so learn to throw it, | Okay. There's another crime in the making, your car is about to run a stop sign. And right now, we are eating dinner and watching TV! Not even when the hammer left my hands Oh, it's Miss Honey. a contract. front bottom. . I'll tell ya, six hours a day of school IS NOT enough. Please! I got carried away. Past Alice. endobj Please! MR WORMWOOD enters with a lackey, who sits on a tyre behind him. MATILDA 2. BRUCE turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. A little more bah-da, ba ba ba-da bom! Agatha Trunchbull: I'll come in there and pound your miserable hide! What about the Bi-Annual International Amateur Salsa and Ballroom Dancing Championships? He rips out several pages and throws them dramatically on the ground. Zinnia Wormwood: I will not say anymore! My daddy says I'm his special little guy. Hanging down by your ears. 3. A long table with the word "Birthday" emblazoned on it moves forward, with little hands creeping along the bottom. Would rob them of their hope of living happily. I don't want any, thank you. It was the biggest burp I had ever heard, the biggest burp I had ever heard about. And I will teach you a thing or two. 2. Stop scaring your mother with that book, boy. After your first day of school! Nothing will change. Maybe you used some of mummy's peroxide by mistake. Over a drink. [He tries and fails to pull his hat off, tugging on it several times.] Dosvedoo-dah. 9:17, suspect exits domicile. Mind? All grown-ups get scared, just like children. It's just pathetic! Stupid, nasty, stinking, slimy . A fool? Have a marshmallow. Auuurrrgh! Get the hell outta here! Agatha, This is Magnus. MR WORMWOOD Jul 25, - Barney Stinson's Harry Potter pick up lines. . My daddy says I'm a bore. But I've got a baby! Secrets. Keep out of reach of children. . MRS WORMWOOD It's . Sixteen times two is thirty-two. Miss Honey: MRS WORMWOOD He did what you asked. CHILDREN Daughter of Mr Harry Wormwood who owns Wormwood Moturs. That's right, sir. Eat. | [as Harry switches on Matilda's lamp] LAVENDER The CHILDREN thrash in their seats. [she shoves Jenny out of her office and slams the door after her]. I don't know what you're talking about. and look at reading. PDF Matilda Act 2 MATILDA THE MUSICAL [] BRUCE - Beck Backstage . . Harry Wormwood: [throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown] I have a nice house, a wonderful husband and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs. It's out of the question. Suddenly, out came the Escapologist, dressed as usual in his tights and spangly costume. Chocolate cake. Well, then stop her reading! It's not even eight thirty! MRS PHELPS and I shan't be talking to you for the rest of the evening, you horrid little man! You haven't got time for "but". But she was about to discover she had a strength a strength she wasn't even aware of. Two, three, four. I am GUILTYwhen the Headmistress says I am GUILTY.". "There's more than one Whomping Willow at Hogwarts, you know.". Look what you've done, you stupid woman. [to MATILDA] You! MISS HONEY enters and knocks. As I was saying, Matilda. COUPLE 2 . When the hinges creak and the door is closed, They're the bane of my life. [to the phone] I'm gonna call you straight back. MATILDA hides the glue behind her back as MR WORMWOOD enters. Miss Honey: Is there still time for the Bi-Annual Inter-Championship Amateur Sausage . MATILDA Matilda: You have a worm, You're supposed to be teaching SPELLING, not poetry! [while putting baby Matilda in the sink to rinse away spinach] I'm not in favor of girls getting all clever-pants, Miss Hussy. Neigh! I'll tell you something. Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. No way! . Pp6Q &_!Ekp?$w_AG[nU6v^^Wo:9o>:. He's fantastic! Tess of the D'urbervilles . I want to be in school. MR WORMWOOD [the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house]. [He pulls the towel over his head and starts massaging vigorously]. Dr. Seuss Pick Up Lines. But I think it's good for grown-ups to have their own space. It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. You make money? . You're being pathetic! MISS HONEY Agatha Trunchbull: Wonderful. A really strong stomach. 107+ Best Pick Up Lines for Flirting [Cute, Cheesy, Funny] [speaking to Matilda about her and her father] Mum, would you like to hear a story? Matilda Wormwood! Oh my. Sued by who? Or - or say you were sued for selling a faulty car. Now, the secret to my success in business is . MR WORMWOOD What did you think? See more ideas about pick up lines funny, pick up lines cheesy, pick up lines. She opens a book. You have to force the little squits to toe the line! I think she might be an idiot. Harry Wormwood: . 4. [She gets on all fours as RUDOLPHO rides her like a horse.] [grabbing and clenching Miss Honey's wrist very tightly in her fist] Is the first word . This morning, you sneaked like a serpent into the kitchen and stole a slice of my private chocolate cake from my tea tray. A book? | . The curtain is wheeled away to reveal MRS WORMWOOD. MATILDA And it was the most scrumptious cake in the entire world. MATILDA They're like insects: they should be got rid of as early as possible. MISS TRUNCHBULL Not a dot did I stray from the plot. Oh, of course. You don't use sympathy or tenderness. Wait, Dad, you're going too fast. Can't you sell good cars, Dad? NIGEL The table stops and the hands hit the ground. ], [She turns and walks back to her desk. MR WORMWOOD Oh, er, hello. MISS HONEY is browsing the stacks. Cancelled, because my wife is . Amanda Thripp: Only when they deserved it, of course. . 2 0 obj Harry Wormwood: She misses me so much. If they start to squeeeeze out of your ears, you're going to need help. Mr. Wormwood: My mummy says I'm a jumped-up little germ, The condition is characterised by the sufferer experiencing bouts of chronic fatigue, and falling suddenly asleep, often without knowing, or any warning at all. Back before my life had ended, ], MISS HONEY Even time loves us.". The scene changes to the library. Oh, yes. 8. No one's gonna tell you when to shake your tush. We'll wait until she's gone, then we'll go get your doll. Oh, it's nothing like that. Children are maggots! A long table with the word "Birthday" emblazoned on it moves forward, with little hands creeping along the bottom. [She throws the baton across the stage, does a jet to catch it, and points her finger at MISS HONEY.] I don't want green hair. ", MATILDA and the ACROBAT'S SISTER [off-stage] As me. 3. . Harry Wormwood: You cannot see squat . All the while, AMANDA's screams get louder. 'Cause you've gotta highlight what you got. But here it is, coming true: Yes, wonderful. It is flanked by AMANDA and ERIC in lab coats over their costumes. MISS TRUNCHBULL Stand out from the crowd! Matilda: I don't know. He flails around the stage.] Parents wheeling strollers enter alongside their CHILDREN. Whoa! Excellent man. Look at that! MATILDA PICK UP LINES! Matilda Character Analysis | LitCharts 2022 | Maturity Rating: PG | 1h 56m | Kids & Family Movies. And you may sit and read while I teach the others, and, well, if you have any questions, I shall do my best to answer them. Don't waste this. MRS PHELPS I'm gonna give you a tanning like you never had in your life! MISS TRUNCHBULL MISS TRUNCHBULL Is it some modern miracle of calculus MRS WORMWOOD Yesterday, she caught Julius Rottwinkle eating a gobstopper during science. What about the Russians? the Acrobat's sister. MATILDA %PDF-1.5 MRS WORMWOOD 9. When I grow up . AAAAAHHHHH! Then get out of town. "I have a pen, you have a phone number. Well it's hard for me to remember a specific cake. MR WORMWOOD Lissy Doll, I called her. I wonder why they didn't just change their story. I did *not* glue my hat to my head! MISS TRUNCHBULL Matilda: 330+ Best Pickup Lines Funny, Cheesy, Cute & Bad - iAMHJA Seven times two is fourteen. Matilda: I mean, I know you say you didn't, but obviously, you did. Did I drift off and dream for a minute or two? 105 Cute Pick-Up Lines That'll Make Them Smile And Text You Back The less you have to say, the louder you yell it. MR WORMWOODOh, my good Lord. The Secret Garden . You're getting on a plane, Mrs Wormwood? MRS PHELPS [asked to sign Matilda's adoption papers]. Sit down. Mrs Wormwood, do you really have no idea? Whoever painted The Trunchbull must have had a strong stomach. And, while you're at it, why don't you stick your stupid book to your stupid head? The 28 Best Matilda Quotes - bookroo.com Do you think I altered my intended elevation? FBI Agent Bob: MATILDA What a dear! I can see And this gown is nothing like the semi-formal, the Acrobat's sister, a frightening woman who used to be an Olympic-class hammer-thrower, who loved nothing better than to scare the children of the town. Before my happy days were Over, Have to admit [turns to Michael] Whatever you do, just don't give in. Harry Wormwood: Well? But I . One should avoid confrontation when possible. google_color_url="320000"; In fact, it must have been her who put that stink bomb under my desk this morning. Your mommy is a TWIT! Stories. Yes, I know what caveat emptor means, you lowlife liar! Oh, my word, he's an ugly little thing. MISS TRUNCHBULL For those idiots out there who don't know how to play, here's how it goes. Harry Wormwood: But I shan't enjoy it, because of the despicable way in which you have spoken to me tonight. MATILDA starts pouring the hair dye into the Oil of Violets bottle. [mimicking Amanda with a high-pitched tone] Was it magic? [He sits down in a zen position.]. What poem would that be? Hide me! And if you cry it will be (W) double. Stop. It was like the entire world went silent for that [wielding a hammer throw] Harry Wormwood: Four judges in outrageous costumes sit behind it. Dad too. That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous? No, it's fine. Just knock on the door. Funny Tinder pickup lines. And I'm very sorry . . If you always take it on the chin and wear it, Matilda: The scene freezes again for BRUCE to talk. . Like you, I was curious, Go on, then! What're they going to do, repossess the kid? MR WORMWOOD [He does a split in front of MISS HONEY. . School is really fun, according to my mum. They were written that way: MR WORMWOOD, towel wrapped about his shoulder, enters the bathroom with MICHAEL. [Matilda uses her powers to slam her bedroom door in Harry's face just as he reaches it]. No! I mean, take a look at you and me. You have to put it right . He should have thought of that before he made a pact with Satan and decided to steal my cake! abilities. We have everything . Agatha Trunchbull: Well, this crime took place before school started. I live in a cage, Harry! Look at these trophies. 'Twas written in the stars before they even met. [Talking about the cake] google_color_text="5F6A72"; [to Michael] I mean, it's just not normal for a girl to be all . Or if the scream in your head even reached your mouth! And when you scream, you don't know if the sound came out, I think you'll want your trousers loose. And always keep your feet inside the line! 125 Best Tinder Pick Up Lines (Plus, Bumble Pick Up Lines) - Parade Agatha Trunchbull: Sell me a lemon? MISS TRUNCHBULL MRS PHELPS Matilda: Er, what books did you read? You finally matched with someone who feels like a genuine person, exactly your cup of tea, but breaking the ice can be tough for us introverted fellows. The dumber the act, the bigger the confession. A storm can begin with the flap of a wing. Harry Wormwood, owner, founder, whatever. She holds up the final "10". What are you talking about? But this little girl . Agatha Trunchbull: He's over there, under those coats. MATILDA In my school? Ah-ah-aah-ah. I think you've got something in your eye. Trivia so I pick it up and - No! ], CHILDREN . Watch Roald Dahl's Matilda The Musical | Netflix Official Site [comes up to her and Matilda stands up] You have just made a very big mistake. She laughs. A girl should think about make-up and hair dye. MAN: So hilarious. | Share this Matilda : I love it here! I can see we're not going to agree, are we? Trunchbull: [She holds her hand out to MATILDA, who takes it.] You're the spitting image. Let's leave maths for the time being . Miss Honey: But there was no sign of the Acrobat, and no glimpse at all of her shiny white scarf. Narrator: MISS HONEY I can! Harry Wormwood: See who wins. Matilda (1996) - Quotes - IMDb "So I hear you are the Head Girl of your house". And expensive, $9.25 for a bar of soap? I mean, my mum wanted me to stay at home with her. Oh, it will only take a moment. Oh, cook . You show the little brat! Narrator: Matilda, 4 Years: MR WORMWOOD My daddy says I'm his special little guy! And this . MATILDA Three judges hold up signs reading "10" as MRS WORMWOOD sits on the table. I love your stories, Matilda! [on the phone, yells] . What on earth did you do that for? Like you, I was (Q) curious, . Ow! One of the novel's antagonists, Mr. Wormwood is Matilda and Michael 's father, and Mrs. Wormwood 's husband. I think in effect, Agatha Trunchbull: The cook enters, holding an enormous chocolate cake on a tray, along with a wooden spoon. Oh, my good Lord. google_color_link="000000"; I chose looks! Brand new stock, sir! google_ad_width=120; And remember to be eXtremely careful. That love and fate and a touch of stupidity The guy with the stupid haircut! It's Miss Honey. What? Six times two is twelve. The DOCTOR and the CHILDREN sing into their stethoscopes. . I have to tell you, Headmistress, that in . Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. I'm gonna sue you, I'm gonna burn down your showroom! Three times two is six. You're just wasting energy, I think he blinked. Miss Honey: Well done, Bogtrotter. . The scene switches to the Wormwood's living room.
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